Tackle the Text One Is the Loneliest Number

by Callie Leary on 06.11.2010

52 Responses

It was late afternoon as I rode my bike past the Big Brothers and Big Sisters Center. The windows were dark, and I knew the center was closed for the week. But like stef_stone, I harbored hope that Amanda would be there, maybe setting up for this big commercial shoot that Nia told us about. I knew it was a long shot—RRRules, invisible, and ICUPEEKING all made good arguments for why Amanda wouldn’t show up. But you know what they say—hope springs eternal, right?

I slowed my pedaling so I could coast along, straining my neck to see…well, I don’t know exactly what I hoped I’d see. But as I was riding by, I caught a glimpse of movement on the playground behind the building, so I decided to go check it out.

I heard the kids before I really saw them. A bunch of kids were playing tag, and at first they didn’t seem to notice me at all. But as I got closer, their shouting and laughing stopped, and some of the older ones gave me suspicious looks. I started to wish I hadn’t come. 

“Hey,” I called to one of the older boys who made eye contact with me. He looked maybe ten. “What are you guys doing?”

“Nothing” he said, digging his hands in his pockets. He looked guilty. “Playing tag.”

“That’s cool.”  I love tag. “Freeze tag?”

The boy cracked a smile. “Nope,” he said. “Cops and robbers.”

“Oh. Never heard of that one.”

The kid and I just  stared at each other for a minute. I could not figure out why they were all so squirrelly. Finally he said, “So… you’re not gonna tell? We can keep playing?”

I looked at him confused. “Tell what?” I asked.

His cheeks flushed and he shrugged, embarrassed. “Well, we're not supposed to be here without our mentors,” he said. “But sometimes …” He paused, then wend on. “It's not always so great being home alone.”

Of all people, I knew exactly what he meant. I remembered what it was like after my mom disappeared, when my dad was a total zombie and I was left to my own devices a lot of the time. I was so lonely. The only person I’d really had was Amanda. And then she was gone.

“Your secret’s safe with me,” I said, smiling, and the boy grinned and took off running. As I watched them play, I realized that even though we still didn’t have any proof that Amanda was connected to the center, the place suits her. I mean, it’s kind of sad, but in a way, these kids are a lot like her—alone.

And we definitely don’t know for sure, but Hal and I once discussed the possibility that Amanda doesn’t even have parents. 

Hal spoke first. “I never met her mom. She talked about her a lot, but I never actually met her. Do you think that’s weird?”

Who was I to say what was weird?

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Well, like…I almost started to think…” Hal looked embarrassed, as if he was about to say something truly outrageous. “I almost started to think she didn’t have a mom. That she was on her own. Does that sound crazy?”

I remembered my own sense that Amanda was somehow too cool to have regular parents, but I hadn’t thought of living with her grandparents as being on her own exactly. It was a scary thought. I mean, I guess in some ways I was on my own, what with my mom being MIA and my dad being AWOL himself. But it wasn’t like if something really big happened to me and I needed him, he wouldn’t come through.

Was it?

Imagining what it really meant to be “on your own” was creeping me out.

Do you ever feel like you’re on your own?  Do you think Amanda is?

52 responses

  1. RRRules

    I sometimes feel alone. I feel for these kids playing tag.
    As for AV, she does seem like the independent type. But what if she’s just a regular kid trying to have some fun? Isn’t that possible too?
    Maybe AV is the confident-on-the-outside, insecure-on-the-inside type? Maybe she’s living somewhere in Orion we haven’t been, her and her family, and she just wants some friends?

    • fashionista17

      Sometimes I get lonely at school when my friends just disappear before my eyes. I know what those kids are going through.

      For AV, I agree with RRRules. She’s not the kind who chats or interacts with people. I use to be like that. But, I know someone like that. Her name is Kaitlyn. She never talked in class and she speaks in a low tone. You can barely hear her!

      In answer to the question up there, AV is. If she wasn’t on her own, they why would she gives Hal, Callie, and Nia different addresses to where she lived. So that question is a yes.

      “Maybe she’s living somewhere in Orion we haven’t been, her and her family, and she just wants some friends?” I totally agree with that, RRRules(Nice idea!). That’s also a yes.

      AV is definitly like them. Same same same.
          -emilys861♥

      • trumpetgirl

        I have totally felt alone. Sometimes, I feel like my friends are from a different planet that I am, or maybe it’s the other way around. They just seem too hyper and spaztic for my taste sometimes, but I don’t know. Just today, all my friends went on a field trip without me and before they left (and when they came back) they said things like ‘have a fun time in school’ and ‘you would have loved the movie! It was great.’ So yeah, I understand that feeling, I had to get through the whole day without anyone to eat lunch with, or talk to.

        Although unlike these kids (except on weekends) I don’t mind coming home. But I just read a book about a Korean girl who has an abusive father, and just moved to America (A Step from Hevan), and I feel quite bad for these kids, but it’s good they have the big brothers big sisters thing for support.

        Truthfully, I don’t think Amanda is lonely. Alone, yes, most definitly. But there’s a difference between being alone, and being lonly. Sometimes I just want people to not bother me, just let me be silent and rest my brain. I believe at times, Amanda might feel sad (about being alone), but then she is strong enough to focus on her mission (whatever that is), and she has her guides too. I also think that we will never be able to unravel Amanda’s mind, even if she tried to explain it to us. It is much to complicated, a woven web of tons of information, feelings, and mystery.

        • EllaMarie

          Every time I think about growing and living on my own…I just feel so alone. The world’s so big…Like right now. One of my friend’s went to Florida, with out me. And I just feel even more alone than usual. You know what I mean?

          And I’m not really the type of person to chat or interact with people either. Sometimes I just don’t know what to say. Like when I go to a one school and a couple of others who go to another keep talking about their school. And I don’t even know who their talking about it. Then feel even lonelier. I guess. Even though I am with them. And then of course in school, I am exactly like what you said, emilys861 about Kaitlyn. I hardly ever spoke out loud in class or spoke in a low tone. Other times, I’m not always so shy. Like with friends. I can just be myself.

          My parents often leave me home alone and then my sister leaves a lot. To go see her friends. Lonely.

          And as I’m talking about myself and my lonely life, I’m wondering maybe Amanda felt the same way. Her parents left alone sometimes. Or her parents did something terrible to her. Maybe she left because she wanted to meet other kids who “abandoned.” She didn’t want other people to feel the same way as her. Like that place called Big Brothers and Sisters. She wanted to become to a Big Sister to some little girl.

          Ally ☺

          • ICUPEEKING

            I feel alone sometimes, especially when you feel that everyone around you treats you like your invisible. Personally, I think everyone feels alone or lonely at some point in their life.

            I agree with RRRules that AV seems to be more of an independent type of person. Now whether or not AV has family…...I would have to believe she is alone in that sence (agreeing with trumpetgirl). Either way though, AV has made many friends- the proof is all over this site. And even though she is missing to us, she is a new friend to someone else at this very moment. And for that reason, I don’t think AV ever feels like she’s on her own.

            • RRRules

              trumpet said:
              “Truthfully, I don’t think Amanda is lonely. Alone, yes, most definitly. But there’s a difference between being alone, and being lonly.”

              I agree with that. I completely get what you’re saying, and I think it’s interesting…

              • EllaMarie

                And I know this stupid. But because of what I posted up above. I actually started crying. My life is sort of pathetic. But anyway, I don’t think Amanda is really lonely. Now. But she might have been at one time. That’s why she needs friends from all over the world to keep her lively spirit alive.

                • RRRules

                  It’s okay, Aly. Remember that there’s always someone who cares. Keep your chin up and your smile big. If it comes to this, remember that there’s always someone worse off than you.

                  • EllaMarie

                    Thanks, RRRules. I’ll try too. ☺

                    • Linda_Calista

                      I have felt alone for as long as long as i remember especially after my Dad died, however, i learned that you just have to find reasons to not be alone, my most favourte is what my mother always says ‘There are always 2 people with the same problem as you, and those 2 people have people with the same problem, and so on. We all have problems , we all felt loneliness , but somehow we are all on the same boat’

                      AV being alone, could possibly be true, but she could never be lonely. She was amazing at keeping people’s attention, but was even better on showing what the meaning of friendship is. She did not need a whole crew of friends, all she needed were a few close friends…  then she would have the world.

                      But here we are…  we are her world. We were close friends, just people passing in hallways or even far away admirers, but she could never be lonely with all of us. She knows were here, and right now she is probably talking to a new friend (whom we have never met before) and she will rock someone else’s world.

                      Just like she is rocking ours.

                      • fashionista17

                        Linda_Calista, I agree with you completely. How sad that your father died. I’m so sorry…

                        • Linda_Calista

                          ahaha thank you.

                          Why do you say sorry? Things happen for a reason, and i realized pity never goes no where because it makes you fall.

                          The way Amanda thinks, got me to say thing like ‘why do i need to feel sad, but why not feel happ that he is not suffering’ Of course i cry, and i do feel lonely, but at least i got a greatt guardian angel!

                          • RRRules

                            keep on truckin’ linda ;)

                            • AlexInvisible

                              Maybe Amanda IS all alone, and that’s why she has so many guides- they’re her family.
                              Also, maybe that’s why she likes to be so dramatic and stuff. When you’re alone, you’re invisible. Maybe Amanda figures if she’s definitely visible, she won’t be so alone.

                              • stef_stone

                                I think that everyone feels alone sometimes, even if they are surrounded by people. I sometimes feel the most alone when I’m in a crowd because you feel like you are invisble and unnoticed and unimportant. It’s funny because when you are there, no one really notices, but when you are gone (like Amanda) everyone cares.
                                It would be a lot more difficult for an adult and teenager to disappear so completely than just a teenager (adults have bank records, taxes, recorded fingerprints, police records, etc.) Also, for Amanda to be who she was (unique, uninhibited) it would make more sense for her to be alone. It seems like teenagers are unconsciously influenced by their parents to be more “upstanding” sometimes.

                                • AllieK

                                  I have felt alone a lot of times, sometimes I feel like there’s no one around for me.  Like sometimes I feel distant from my friends and family.  I think Amanda is alone too, she seems like a pretty independent person.  I agree with what AlexInvisible said that she likes to be unique and unusual because she can stand out and won’t be unnoticed because she’s alone.

                                  • SerenaRules

                                    sometimes I feel like no one cares. that makes me feel alone
                                    Wait, what if amanda is trying to find her parents
                                    what if amanda is trying to find callies mom
                                    what if callies mom is amandas mom
                                    no thats… not possible right?

                                    • BlueRoseGrey

                                      Yes. i feel alone. a lot. like when this kid at my school makes fun of me. because of my weirdness. Or when the boy i like ignores me. I don’t like feeling alone… its not the best feeling in the world. :( All my characters in my different books that i write are always alone… i think it portrays what i feel like sometimes… And Amanda being alone? i wouldn’t doubt it. If she made up so many different stories about her family to find out that possibly none of them are true? Yeah, i see that as a definate possibility. I mean, she’s so independent, and personally, i think that being alone leads to being independent. Although… she did depend on us guides a lot… maybe we were her “Family”. That’s how it is in a lot of books i write. The characters friends are their family. But then… theres a difference between _feeling_ alone and actually _being_ alone. I, personally, enjoy being by myself up in my room with music blaring. I don’t _feel_ alone then. But if there’s none of my friends in my class, then i feel alone. Because there’s a whole bunch of people, but i’m by myself anyway. Does that make sense? I hope it does… maybe Amanda’s like that. She enjoys her “alone time” but she also feels alone at times. I hope that makes sense. It does to me, i guess.

                                      • Fearless

                                        i do feel alone; a lot actually. and i guess that Amanda is alone but wen u think about it, she isn’t. i mean, she has all these perfectly nice (and some not) people looking for her and so many friends. if i were fer i wouldn’t feel alone.

                                        • Squiggles

                                          I think she knew so many people there must be SOMEONE looking out for her… maybe she’s looking for her parents? It’s possible to know so many people and still feel so alone.

                                          Also IT is the country code for Italy, so you might be looking for someone italian (is there an italian restaurant/pizza place/ice cream place nearby? Sorry if this has already been said)

                                          • lil*dezray

                                            evryone’s been alone at some point in their life, right? it’s a feeling we all go through, especially when…u know…we hit the teen stage. a lot of the time i feel like im better off being alone. im used to it. my mom’s a marine biologist and my dad’s a marine mamal vet - so he’ll tak care of dolphins, sea turtles, whales…you get it. it is really cool at times( i wanna b like my dad when i grow up:D) but i have my days. we move around a lot, so i’ve lived in a lot of warm countries where nobody speaks english. we usually never stay in one place for more thab a month ir two so i’ve never really had a best friend. if we ever do stick around, my parents are both gone evry mnth for bout a week(minimum). i dunno wat id do without my older sister.  i can adapt to my surroundings fairly well…but it’s just not the same with people u no?? moving around so much hasnt exactly turned me into a people person. my family’s great (i love em to pieces really i do) but it gets to b real quiet under my roof. often. so whenever i do get the chance to go 2 the movies wit a friend or have a sleepover or watnot? i dont take it for granted. and i relly try to keep those moments as long as possible. i wish i could just box it up and take it with me to wherever im headed next. so in a way, being alone can be a good thing…sorta. it just depends on how you look at it.

                                            • Girl

                                              I know this is stupid to say on a page about Amanda but I think this website is a little stupid in a way. I accidentally found it. I think it’s really stupid that everyones relating themselves to this “Amanda” person when actually your all nothing like her. Well, maybe you feel alone sometimes but you can change that. She apparently lives alone which probably makes her homeless? So, anyone with a computer is not alone the way she’s alone. If she doesn’t have a family she’s homeless and has NOTHING. You people, your stories are depressing,yes but lighten up a bit. Please! Smile every once in while can’t you? Enjoy your life. You have a bed, a loving guardian, and a freaking computer! All you need is to except other people. Don’t fight with them. Smile at them. Even if you don’t like them AT ALL. They might just become your best friend. LIGHTEN UP AND I LOVE YOU ALLL!!!
                                              -Anoynomous

                                              • Linda_Calista

                                                Girl, you are an inspirational positive speaker.
                                                And you are reminding people what we need to think.
                                                Positivity.
                                                Believe it or not, we need it if we want to find Amanda.
                                                Thank you for reminding us this.
                                                Alot of people need to hear that.

                                                • RRRules

                                                  Girl: You can say that AV is much worse off than us, but remember: AV is fiction. PLENTY of fiction character are way worse off than we are. Just because some people have worse lives than us, doesn’t mean we have good lives. They’re only good in comparison. You may say we’re lucky, but either way, this is the here and now. And while we’re here and while it’s now, we’re not doing too good.
                                                  Even though we’re better than others, we’re still worse off than others, too.
                                                  For example, a classmate of mine made a comment and I replied with “If how your hair looks is the worst of your problems, you’re very lucky.” She replied “thanks.”
                                                  So, Girl, you can’t say that we should be happy cause it could be worse. It just doesn’t make sense to get all hypothetical, because even if it COULD be worse, it’s not. It is what it is what it is.

                                                  • Girl

                                                    Oh my god!!! Linda you are my favorite person on here!! I didn’t think you would respond 2 me OMG OMG your awesome!! I love how everyones all like mmhmm girl! Lol I love how when people respond 2 me they are all like girl! Lol I <3 u in a friendish way!!!
                                                    <Removed by Cornelia’s minions>

                                                    • Girl

                                                      RRRULES! U go girl! You have common sense and lots of reason! I know AV is fake and u may have a bad life but what I’m saying is you ppl need 2 be optimistic. I wasn’t saying I don’t feel 4 u or anything I’m just saying, It’s a little snotty to be moaning and groaning about your own lifes! You can be using your problems 2 be understanding someone else’s life. You can help people instead of complaining on some dumb website! I’m not trying 2 offend you, I’m just trying to show you the possibilities. So you rule!!!

                                                      • Girl

                                                        So what’s it gonna be world TEAM RULES OR TEAM GIRL!!???  Jk lol just kidding!! I’m no side taker!

                                                        • invisible

                                                          so first i totaly agree. Agree with who? there are are to many of you to name but here the main ones i agree with RRRules, Trumpetgirl, emilys861♥, and ICUPEEKING (but there is much more of you).

                                                          Most of you mentiond that at one point everyone feels alone and that is 100% true (because if some does not feel alone onec in there lives , theres a problem with them).

                                                          i have alot of friends at school but sometimes, they just dont hang out with me, i feel invisible some times. i think that me feeling invisible some times is because i m on my own most of the time (my choice dont have to be alone )

                                                          my friends know me as the shy, by herself, does not swear, follows every rule, is atomboy.(not all the terms aply to all my friends ).

                                                          but what i really am is some one that is not shy, that dosent just stay in her corner, that swears (only some friends know about this.) that can break rules (nothing bad dont worry, and that can be a girly girl.oh
                                                          and that can be crazy and dance around.

                                                          amand

                                                          i think that amand might of felt alone. Oy chosinbulb just went on in my head callie , nia ,and hal were kind of alone in a way. I think amanda didnt feel alone but b

                                                          • Girl

                                                            wait do you agree with me???
                                                            -Girl <3

                                                            • stef_stone

                                                              Anyways, back to the story, I do think Amanda is probably not living with anyone else. (Like parents or a guardian or something.) That could make it easier for her to live there without attracting suspicion… but maybe also harder because people will wonder why she is living on her own as a teenager.

                                                              • Girl

                                                                NO DONT GO BACK TO THE STORY THE STORIES ARE DRAINING YOUR SELF ESTEEM!!!

                                                                • RRRules

                                                                  Girl:
                                                                  “It’s a little snotty to be moaning and groaning about your own lives”
                                                                  “You can be using your problems 2 be understanding someone else’s life. You can help people instead of complaining on some dumb website”
                                                                  “The stories are draining your self-esteem”
                                                                  @First of all, none of us were “moaning and groaning”.
                                                                  @Second of all, who says we aren’t trying to help others? A handful of members have, in addition to mentioning their own lives, tried to comfort other members.
                                                                  @Third of all, we aren’t “complaining on some dumb website”. Besides for the fact that the question was “Do you ever feel like you’re on your own?” often talking to other people when everything is anonymous can help you feel better.
                                                                  @And, I don’t think TAP is draining people’s self-esteem. I think classmates and friends are the ones making certain lives sadder. If anything, this site is helping.

                                                                  (PS: I know this is online, and I haven’t used any emoticons or anything, so this is one of those discussions that you don’t know if a person is yelling or talking calmly. FYI, this isn’t a yelling-at-the-top-of-my-lungs rant post. Just a calm debate. I want you to remember that, because I don’t mean to upset you in any way.)

                                                                  • stef_stone

                                                                    I agree with you, RRRules. Girl, this is the Amanda Project and it is here to help us solve the mystery of Amanda’s disappearance, not to argue about things that don’t really matter. I don’t know what you mean about the stories draining self esteem, but we have gotten a lot closer to finding Amanda since this site was started and I really appreciate the website. If you don’t appreciate it, please don’t complain on the stories where everyone has to read about it.

                                                                    • RRRules

                                                                      stef- I appreciate your support, but she isn’t trying to diss TAP. On a real life level, getting closer to finding AV is meaningless, as she doesn’t actually exist. And as for the other bit; you’ll have to look through the past few posts for that.

                                                                      • lil*dezray

                                                                        finding AV isn’t totally meaningless. its gonna give the TAP series a real sweet ending, and its gonna b an awsome read. although i do agree with the whole “this site is draining our self esteem” thing. Girl, i got so much self esteem like you wouldn’t *believe*!!! tee hee- luv u guys :P

                                                                        • fashionista17

                                                                          Girl, are you ok? I don’t think you should be shouting at us.

                                                                          • Schyler

                                                                            I have learned to appreciate solitude.Sometimes you just need to think about something and being away from everything can help.Since I moved from Des Moines,Iowa I have lost touch with my best friend.I keep trying to call her and stuff but it seems that the only solution would be to drive to her house and see whats going on.I’m not saying that I don’t have other friends because I do.Up here I have maybe ten really good friends.It’s not that I like being alone but it isn’t too bad when you choose to be alone.
                                                                            And on another topic:Girl,we are not “some dumb site” this may be based on fiction but in a way,I think it has taught us how to work together when we really need to.And how the heck is the story “draining our self esteem”?I feel no different then how I felt before I even heard about TAP.I agree with RRRules.If anything is draining our self esteem,it’s our friends and people who KNOW how to hurt us.There a lot of people with lives that worse than ours are.I don’t get to see my dad a whole lot.In fact I see him maybe four days a month.But at least I don’t have to worry about if I will EVER see him again.I think we are all aware that there are people who would KILL to have a lives like ours.Even if it’s only a few steps away from where they are,they still know that it’s better than were they are now.I have a pretty good life,even if I feel trapped sometimes.It’s still better than having live in a tent or on the streets.I don’t mean to sound like I’m ranting,I’m just saying my opinion.

                                                                            • RRRules

                                                                              Maybe we should drop it completely. I’m usually the peaceful type, and this little debate me and Girl were having seems to have escalated into a fight, with people picking sides.

                                                                              Girl: I left a message on your profile. I’m sorry if I upset you. Please don’t ignore the note. I understand that you’re upset and I hope we can make this better.
                                                                              Love,
                                                                              RR

                                                                              • Ralyat

                                                                                I feel alone quite often. I’m… different from other kids, especially at my school. I dress, talk, and act different, I even listen to different music. But I’m glad I’m unique. And I have one friend that lives a couple states away who is soooooo much like me who helps me get through it all. So I guess I’m not too much alone. I also feel alone when I think about the future and living alone…. Back to AV. I think she could very well be alone. Maybe her parents ‘disowned’ her. Or maybe she was left behind by her real family and raised by a different family that found her but maybe their in hiding from something,..... or someone. Maybe she was left at an adoption center and in on a search for her family and just left the center. Just brainstorming….

                                                                                • lil*dezray

                                                                                  YEA RALYAT!!! good. job. and wayda go on being a one and only =) i really admire u for that and i wish i could remember to think of that when life starts to suck. as for Manda’ parents disowning her…dats just heartbreaking =(  but 2 b honest…it couldve happened. i also think u might b on to somthin with “Amanda’s search for her family”. she could very well be traveling from place to place, looking and asking around for signs of her family. maybe she just couldnt dig anything up on her folks wherabouts while she was in Orion, so she just left.

                                                                                  • invisible

                                                                                    sorry couldnt get on the computer on till now (stupid viruses using my laptop now instead of my desk computer (because of the virus) and my laptop is slow)


                                                                                    - Girl -
                                                                                            I do agree with you, but not for eveything. Yes this is fiction and we will never find amanda,because shes fiction too. I think comparing our selves too amanda is not good and that we shouldnt (like you said), but i think that when people wrote that they felt alone, is leaving them away too express them selves and feel better after. BUT I A

                                                                                    • invisible

                                                                                      GREE WITH YOU.


                                                                                      - invisible - ; )

                                                                                      • tay_tay

                                                                                        I ALWAYS FEEL ALONE LIKE NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME LIKE I LIE TO MY PARENT IM DEPRESSED THEY JUST DONT NO IT I DONT WANT THEM 2 EVER FIND OUT U KNOW?  AND I HAVE THIS WHOLE LITTLE FACADE THE ONLY WAY I CAN ECSCAPE IS 2 GO IN MY ROOM AND READ READING SOLVES EVERY THING LETS U KNOW YOUR NOT ALONE

                                                                                        • tay_tay

                                                                                          THEY R OTHER PEOPLE LIKE U AND THAT U DONT HAVE TO BE ALONE LIKE TWILIGHT LETS YOU ECSAPE REALITY AND MAKES U FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOUR SELF AND SO DOES THE AMANDA PROJECT   =  {

                                                                                          • *Yuli*

                                                                                            i feel 4 u taY ! THE BEST THING TO DO IS TELL UR PARENTS SO THEY CAN HELP U ! i dont mean 2 sound mean , but u should get some help . trust me its the best thing 2 do !

                                                                                            • iGuard2010

                                                                                              bur RRRules if she really just wanted to make some friends, why not just stay where she was? And why hide so much of her life from them? That just doesn’t seem like the best way to go about making friends. Especially if you just up and disappear and keep leaving them these odd clues that really don’t lead them to you

                                                                                              • WhoIAm_Tigote

                                                                                                Tay-Tay I feel your pain. I am seriously mature for my age(which If you knew how old I am than you would agree with everyone that says it). I Get depressed because It seems as though I can’t talk to anyone about how I feel. I totally escape to my room to read or solve problems (kinda like the Amanda project clues). I have more secrets than anyone can even comprehend. I am alone most of the day(I am home schooled and don’t have any friends, plus It’s like I teach myself everything my mom just makes sure I am doing it right).  I am so depressed sometime I think about doing things I should(Not sexual thing) I am happy that I have everything I do. I do try to be bouncing off the walls happy (and sometimes am). Please do not say That I am moaning and groaning and complaining about my life, because It kinda feels better to talk to people who don’t even know me or how old I am or what I look like. And Writing drawing and reading or solving things help me escape my life. I lie a lot about what I feel. Well would it be a lie if said I am F.I.N.E.(if you don’t know what it means look it up)I can’t talk to my parents, I can’t talk to my brother (and I wihs I could talk to my sister(I am not telling why I said I wish))

                                                                                                And is it true that The Amanda Project isn’t real? because it seems to be.

                                                                                                • Girl

                                                                                                  Hey its me again, okay thanks everyone who agreed with me and i know i was wrong for calling this website stupid but look at the bigger picture its not REAL. I just want you guys to quit being solemn and to have a nice socail life… and obviously expressing it on the internet isnt doing it 4 you. I know I came on wayy 2 strong but im trying to prove a point. I want you guys to have friends and not be lonely but I also want u 2 look at the bigger picture again. I know it feels good to talk to people that dont know you like Who iam_Tigote said but I want you guys to have close friernds that you can talk to so then you dont get stuck on this website. I feel that u guys have had enough support on the internet and you need to have a close friend to back you up and talk to u. plus they always be there unlike me. I’m just a girl.
                                                                                                  Love you guys,
                                                                                                  Girl

                                                                                                  PS RRRules i am making a pact that we are going to be internet buds u and me i wanna be friends not enemies but i did like our debat peace, love, and lots of girls!!!

                                                                                                  • Girl

                                                                                                    Oh and RRRules I have not quit the site but I didnt look at it 4 a while cuz it lost its point to me :) thanks for the reasurring message on my account and yes, AV is still stupid 2 me but im happy to be on it

                                                                                                    • WhoIAm_Tigote

                                                                                                      Girl I have a couple of friends. Their just all over the world and Over the internet(I’m home-schooled and my dads in the army) I am not Solemn all the time. I am a very bubbly person when I am in a good mood.

                                                                                                      It alll comes down to my mood . Ask my brother and his many bruises.

                                                                                                      • RRRules

                                                                                                        @Girl: deal :)
                                                                                                        @WhoIAm: Totally agree with you on the mood thing! (And on the brother thing xD lol)

                                                                                                        (Sorry it took so long to reply.)

                                                                                                        • WhoIAm_Tigote

                                                                                                          @RRRules lol

                                                                                                          You must be logged in to see responses and contribute to the conversation.

                                                                                                          Latest Responses

                                                                                                          1. Connect the Dots

                                                                                                            I think Amanda's trying to tell them she's still in Orion!

                                                                                                          2. It's a Small World After All

                                                                                                            Sorry the part after that is... _A s**tty S**tty end! And that is a f**cked up …

                                                                                                          3. It's a Small World After All

                                                                                                            Jess, I am dissapointed too, the reason they are letting go is because the story came …

                                                                                                          4. My Dearest, Daring Detectives:

                                                                                                            Goodbye Amanda. I wish I could have really known you.

                                                                                                          5. It's a Small World After All

                                                                                                            I'm sorry, but I agree with Silent-seas. This wasn't the end I imagined. Even after reading …

                                                                                                          Most Popular

                                                                                                          1. Amanda's Yellow Brick Road

                                                                                                          2. Cross my heart and hope to die…

                                                                                                          3. Trickster Tagging

                                                                                                          4. It's in the Cards, Or is it?

                                                                                                          5. The Transatlantic Railroad

                                                                                                          Subscribe to Our Stories

                                                                                                          Be the first to know when discoveries are made!