poop :)

It made so much sense, I was like totally duh, now your name in lights.

Kelsey wants to borrow a sweater from her older sister Nadia. Nadia doesn’t want to lend it to her because it’s ripped in the front. They both live in a nursing home.

Lifeline frazzled suburban swarming tweed stormy island behaviors.

Ian accuses his friend Richard of not playing fair. Richard denies the accusation because Ian is a compulsive liar at five years old.

Three year old Janelle tells a secret to her best friend Shannon. Shannon doesn’t believe her because she implies Santa is fake. 

Tommy explains to his teacher Mr. Ronson why he didn’t turn in a book report. Tommy is 21 and can’t read.

A Discontented Sugar Broker
Against all minor things that rack
A nicely balanced mind, I’ll back
The noisy chaff
And ill-bred laugh
Of clerks on omnibuses.
His friends, who heard his money [removed],
And saw the house he rented,
And knew his wife, could never think
What made him discontented.
It never struck their simple minds
That fads are of eccentric kinds,
Nor would they own
That fat alone
Could make one discontented.
“Your riches know no kind of pause, 
Your trade is fast advancing,
You dance-but not for joy, because
You weep ad you are dancing.”
His knock advertised no dun,
No losses made him sulky,
He had one sorrow-only one-
He was extremely bulky.
A man must be, I beg to state,
Exceptionally fortunate
Who owns his chief
And only grief
Is being very bulky.
“This load,” he’d say, “I cannot bear,
I’m nineteen stone or twenty!
Henceforward I’ll go in for air
And exercise in plenty.”
Most people think that, should it come,
They can reduce a bulging tum
To measure fair
By taking air
And exercise in plenty.
In every weather, every day,
Dry, muddy, wet or gritty,
He took dancing all the way
From Brompton to the City.
You do not often get the chance
Of seeing sugar-brokers dance
From their abode
In Fulham Road
Through Brompton to the city.
He braved they gay and guileless laugh
Of children with their nurses,
The loud uneducated chaff
Of clerk omnibuses.

I smell catnip and see a child wearing two pointed ears. There is a poster on the wall with an orange vegetable that menacingly smiles back at me.